Recently I have been seeing a lot of blog posts out there about the importance of close knit girlfriend groups. These are the same group of women who do everything together. They have their girls weekends, celebrations for all occasions and are there for the good and bad in each other’s lives. They are friends for life. As I have read several of these posts, I find I do not fit into these “groups.” Does that mean I am doing something wrong in my friendships?
Then on a recent hike with a friend we were having a conversation about friendships and how the older we get the harder it is to make friends and stay in touch. Some women make it look easy with their group of consistent friends. This got me thinking, I don’t have the same group of friends I hang out with consistently. I have a variety of friends that complete me.
The childhood Friend: I am fortunate to still be very close with my best friend since 3rd grade. Despite her moving several states away when we were in 7th grade we have remained close for over 30 years. We can go several weeks without talking, pick up the phone and act like we just saw each other yesterday. She is the person who knows everything about my life, the good and the bad, and still loves me. No matter what is going on in our lives we have always been there to support each other.
The adult BFF: This is the person who I’ve known since our kids were babies. My emergency contact on my child’s school form, my financial adviser, career consultant and overall life coach. We share many of the same beliefs and keep each other sane in this crazy world. We have a secret love for finding a good deal, decluttering and bartering goods with each other. It is rare we go a day without talking. We are fortunate our husbands are also good friends as we enjoy many laid back evenings with food, laughs, and maybe some alcohol.
The social work friends: I have a confession, at work I am not quick to befriend my co workers, I have a strong belief that you shouldn’t mix your work life with your personal life. This is nothing against my co workers, many of them are amazing, but I like to keep these two parts of my life separate. With that being said, after I leave jobs I have stayed in touch with some of my former coworkers who are now some of my closest friends. Being a social worker you can have some tough times in your career and it is important to have other social workers you trust to confide in for your own self care. Plus who needs a therapist when you have social workers as your friends?
Mom friends: It is always important to know who your child is hanging out with and it’s a bonus when you become friends with the moms. These woman are helpful during the difficult times in motherhood when you feel you can’t do anything right as a mom. They are someone to call when you are in a jam and need help with your child and right along with you celebrating your child’s victories and hugging you during the struggles. Living in a small town I am thankful for my mom friendships.
Hiking friends: It is always nice when you have friends who share the same passion as you. I have made several friends and have been able to maintain friendships thanks to hiking. There is nothing better than knowing you always have a hiking partner, someone up for early morning sunrise hikes or trusting you while exploring a new trail. I have had some of the best conversations, laughs and education in the woods with these women.
Looking back on my life, I have never really been part of a certain “group” of friends, but had a variety of friends with different interests. I do not believe there is anything wrong with having the same group of friends, it’s just not for me. Do not feel like you are doing something wrong if it is not for you either. The various friendship I have fill a purpose in my life and make my life better. Remember your friendships do not have to be perfect, just perfect for you. I would love to know what friendships look like in your life.
